Uh, okay then, Hydro-Man, Fluid Felon, sure
Even with minimal devotion to red, you should be near empty-handed by the time you play this, netting an easy +3-4 cards with your 5/5
You can constantly remove the second counter from The Eldest Reborn to force your opponents to discard a card on every one of your turns, turn Binding the Old Gods into a repeatable Maelstrom Pulse each turn, or get a steady stream of card draw or +1/+1 counters from The First Iroan Games
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Hobbits and their food, right
Ashe, Princess of Dalmasca is a bit on the slow side and only playable in decks with a high concentration of artifacts, but the payoff of filtered card draw when it attacks is high enough to want to support it